“I’ve tried everything.”
But I’m not seeing results.
I don’t believe there is a more common experience for humans.
I hear it all the time with my coaching clients:
“Ashley, I’m so fucking pissed. I’ve been putting in the work. I’ve committed. I’m doing all the right things. But I still (fill in the blank).”
Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever felt like, “What’s the point anymore?”
It’s Hard to Work So Hard
We’ve all been there, including me, and it fucking SUCKS. 😵💫
😵💫 I was there in the first years of growing my online life coaching business when I thought I was doing everything right, but I was still broke.
🤐 I was there when I was going to therapy to work on my communication with Kyle, but I still couldn't get up the courage to ask for what I needed.
😣 I was there when I felt like I was “doing everything right” in my life, eating well, exercising, practicing a great morning routine and setting boundaries.
But I still felt like shit about myself.
Does this sound like you?
👉 You've got kick-ass habits and rituals - but you still feel like shit.
👉 You're being vulnerable in your relationship - but still not getting your needs met.
👉 You're no longer eating take-out - but the scale isn't budging.
👉 You're staying off social media - but you're still feeling not good enough.
If so, keep reading, because I have some solutions for you to get back on track and start feeling the way you want to feel.
Why Is Nothing Working?
First, let’s understand why you might be feeling like you’ve tried everything but you’re not getting the results you desire or feeling the way you want to feel.
Here are five reasons why you might not be seeing the results you desire or feeling the happy feels, even if you're doing everything “right”:
You're trying to be perfect 💎 and control every little thing in your life. You might feel ready but you haven't worked through the fear to get to trust.
You're doing everything ok 🤷🏻♀️, but doing nothing well. Because you think if you do it all, it'll fix everything.
You're seeing all the places you're falling short 👎, not all the places you're fucking killing it.
You're doing it alone 1️⃣.
Deep down, you don't believe you're worthy 🫣 of your goals and the joy that will come with getting what you want. You want happiness, joy and ease desperately, but there is a part of you scared of actually getting it.
How to Make Real Progress
Here are 5 ways to actually see the results you desire, especially if you feel like you’ve “tried everything.”
Gain some perspective. Guess what? Contrary to what you might believe, you haven’t tried everything. This is a clever way that we use to keep ourselves stuck when the thing we are trying to change gets hard. Try this instead:
Be flexible and compassionate with yourself. Try this instead:
Get clear on what really matters. Try this instead:
Recruit support and accountability. (Here are two places to start: Year of Awakening | Online Life Coaching with meee! 🦋)
Sometimes we try to do things alone as a way to protect ourselves from disappointing others if we “fail” or “back out.” But here’s the thing: that’s exactly what support and accountability is for.
It’s for those times when you’re fed up.
It’s for those times when you want to give up, when you’ve forgotten how strong and resilient you are. Try this instead:Try leaning into your wholeness. The belief that we aren’t worthy runs deep and can be generational. Try this instead:
Make a list of all the ways you have already succeeded.
You are absolutely fucking worthy.
You deserve true, holistic happiness.
Try these small shifts - they make a BIG difference. 💜